On March 21 we celebrated what we believed to be Prema's 8th birthday. Two weeks ago we discovered she is much older. In India a bone age was done to determine a birthdate for Prema since all of her history is unknown. ( check out this) Since Christmas time we started noticing signs of puberty and thinking it was odd for an 8 year old. A trip to the pediatrician confirmed the onset of puberty and the need for another bone scan. The bone scan reported that Prema is actually 2 1/2 years older making her 10 1/2 years old. We have been told by one pedIatrician and another adoptive parent in the same situation, that Prema's malnutrition in India resulted in younger looking bones. Now after a year of good food and vitamins her bone age is catching up to her actual age. So the reality is that Prema could also be even older than 10 1/2 as bone ages can't be extremely accurate.
This discovery has brought relief and grief to us. Prema has missed many windows of opportunity for optimal achievement. She may never be fluent in sign language in turn affecting her ability to read and write. Her physical development is far more delayed than we thought. And yet as we grieve these losses for her and us, we also find relief in understanding why we have been working so hard to get Prema to achieve certain things and any achievement has come very slowly and painfully. The pressure we (especially Michelle) have placed upon ourselves and her to "catch up" is lessened now as we change our expectations and dreams for her.
We have decided to keep her legal birthdate as it is (8 years old) since her physical stature and maturity level are not the same as the average 10 year old.
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